I bought Evelyn’s gift weeks ago; I knew exactly what to get her. She’s really excited about moving to the Midwest and she’s been trying to learn how to knit beanies so that she can create matching hats and scarves.

I used to have this weird hat making wheel years ago, so I figured I’d get that for her. I’ve seen them sold in a local craft store, so I picked one up and waited for the big day to come around. I even mentioned it to her to see if she’d be interested. Unfortunately, I mentioned it in front of her sister, SisJ. Who then went out and bought it for Evelyn and presented it to her before I could. Birthday gift stealer!

So there I was, the day of Evelyn’s birthday with nothing to give her. Shit! I thought about what she’d recently mentioned or anything she’d like. Poww had given me these little pineapple cakes from Chinatown and Evelyn had eaten them on our way back from para sailing, so I tried to track those down. Unfortunately, the only store that sold them closed before I got off of work. Fail.

Then I remembered that she mentioned buying new sheets for her dorm. She was excited that they were cheetah print and I saw some cheetah print throw pillows at KMart a few weeks ago. Problem solved! So I rushed over to KMart and ran around their aisles looking for these damn throw pillows. After interrogating every employee I could find, I discovered that they had sold out of the pillows. Double Fail.

Evelyn texted me just then to remind me that she would be home in half an hour for her birthday dessert. Since she already had a party weekend, she was having a few friends over to open gifts and eat some cupcakes. I had 30 minutes to come up with something. I ran around KMart completely lost and just started rummaging through things. I stumbled across a poster for Pirates of the Caribbean 3 and I grabbed it and kept running. I found a funny card and gave up, dragging my feet to the register, disappointed.

I walked past the clearance rack and something caught my eye. It was a black fedora with crystals in a fleur de lis. When we were at Mardi Gras, Evelyn tried on a similar hat but passed on buying it because of the price. I shrugged and picked it up, at the very least I could tell her that I bought it to remind her of our last vacation together before she moves. I quickly bought my items and ran to her house without wrapping anything.


We had strawberry lemonade cupcakes as Evelyn opened her gifts. When she got to mine, I just handed them over. When she held up the hat, she gasped.

“No way! I totally saw this hat at KMart and wanted to get it but I’m trying to save money for my move!”

“Really? I saw it and thought of Mardi Gras!” I said, surprised.

“Yea! Just like that hat I found in-“

“That store near Bourbon St. Exactly!” I said, happy that I’d found the perfect hat.

Even when my original birthday gift plans are ruined, they still work out. I’m the Anti-Fail!

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