Introducing…Chika. Another coworker in this crazy company, she works in the finance department cutting checks. For Lent, Chika gave up fun. Well, not really. She gave up alcohol, but doesn’t it work out to about the same thing?

Chika swore that this year she wouldn’t cheat on her Lent promises, unlike previous years. But after one stressful day she found herself in a restaurant holding the wine list. Screw wine, she wanted something minty.

“I’ll have a mojito.” She ordered, ready to forget that Lent ever existed.

“Uhh I’m sorry, we’re all out of rum.” What!? How is a restaurant ever out of rum? “Can I get you something else?”

Chika’s face fell, man did she want some minty, rum filled goodness. She definitely didn’t want to cheat on Jesus with any other alcohols. So she took it as a sign.

“Naw, that’s ok. I just wanted the mint flavor.”

The waitress could see her total sales slipping and did what any good waitress would do. She tried a substitute. “Well, we could put vodka in it instead of rum. Then you can still have the mint flavor.” Ok, now try to imagine drinking that. Gross, right? Chika said she ended up getting water, but tipped a little extra for the waitress who was creative enough to imagine vodka instead of rum. She decided that Jesus wanted her to stay sober. But sure enough a few days later she started to slip…

Dizzy, Chika and I used to have Therapy Thursdays, where we’d go to a local dive bar and drink beer until it came out of our ears, bitching about work and life. I usually tried to go, but often didn’t make it. Chika has two young boys at home, so she isn’t able to go very often anymore either. After one particularly bad week, she called Dizzy and set up a date for Therapy Thursday (I was unavailable). Too bad Jesus, she thought, I need my Bud Lite.

Barely an hour later, one of her boys reminded her that she needed to wash his baseball uniform for his game that Thursday. Uh oh. Yep, she forgot that her kid had a game on the same night she was going to cheat on Lent. So she cancelled, but now believes that Jesus is preventing her from drinking so she’ll keep her promise. I guess he isn’t busy with anything else. We’ll see if she can hold out until Easter on her own or if she’ll find circumstances continue to force her to forgo alcohol…

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