Here at Anonymous Software Company, we have an unusually large group of men in my department. There are some departments where statistically they often have larger groups of men or women (HR usually has more women, IT usually has more men). This isn’t a hard and fast rule by any means however, my department in many companies is controlled by women. But not in my company. In my company we have 3 women including myself out of 13 people total (not including managers). The other two women are unusually quiet and reserved.

The men on the other hand are loud, boisterous and outgoing. Sometimes it’s difficult being surrounded by the guys who play Call of Duty together after work or compete in sports together. Trust me, they don’t welcome women onto their teams often because they play very seriously. The next day they come in with black eyes and sprains due to their aggressive games.

The other two women don’t seem to mind – one is in college as well as working full time and the other has a family. Now that I don’t have the responsibilities of school and I’m single to boot, I feel left out of the group, but I don’t really want to try to compete with them. I’ve tried to find a way to hang out with them on a level I’m comfortable with but they just don’t seem very interested in non-sport after work activities.

There must be a way to connect with my coworkers on a less agressive level. I just don’t know how!