Quick Recap: My roommate from hell had loud sex next to me while I was trying to sleep, denied that it ever happened, flashed my Granny, set me up to take the blame for her idiocy, had sex again when she knew I was there and damaged personal property. I thought I finally had the upper hand and she proved me wrong. She finally moved out but she wasn’t out of our lives yet.

You may remember that RFH had her music up too loud and the Resident Advisors gave all of us a citation, even though Badonk had asked her to turn her music down, I was out jogging and Smiley wasn’t even in town. We finally had our “hearing” about the citation right after finals. We were all anxious to get this over with since Smiley and I were leaving that night for our family’s houses for Winter Break.

We arrived at the office early, ready to defend our good names and drag RFH’s through the mud. The Resident Advisor reviewing the case let us into his office – and had no idea why we were there. We had to remind him of our case and then we settled down to wait for RFH. And wait. And wait. And wait.

Finally, the Advisor called her from his office phone reminding her to come in. Twenty minutes later she appeared, looking like she’s had one (or five) too many the night before. You should note that this hearing was scheduled for 5PM, so a hangover at that time isn’t really acceptable. We sat down, ready to do battle. The Advisor read a summary of the excessive noise citation and when he paused, Smiley immediately piped up, explaining that she hadn’t even been in town. Badonk and I agreed and then told him that we had nothing to do with the noise. With an air of resignation (or was it just the indifference of a hangover?), RFH said that it was her fault and took the blame.

“I see you have another citation here, from a party that you held where your noise level was too loud and there was alcohol present.” Advisor said.

WHAT!? We never threw a party. That’s when we realized that the only party “we’d” thrown was the one RFH threw while we were all gone when someone left their boxers in Smiley’s bed. Chaos, sheer chaos as we all started berating RFH for getting a citation and not saying we weren’t there. For letting us take the blame for something we’d had nothing to do with twice.

She took responsibility for it and the citation was erased from Smiley, Badonk and my records. We left with barely a glance at her, ready to go home for Christmas and wait for our grades from our first semester at college. The last we heard of RFH, she ran into Smiley on campus the next semester and told her that her BFF had gotten her pregnant. Smiley reported that she didn’t look physically pregnant (but she may have been in her first trimester) and none of us saw her again. Who knows if she was lying or if she really was going to have his kid. All I know is that I learned a valuable lesson – if you don’t like who you live with, don’t try to negotiate and comprimise. Just move dammit!