Mixing too much work with too much depression is really bad for the blogging. I’ve been feeling better over the past few days, so I think there’s some hope that I won’t fall into a funk.

Last weekend was a little crazy. I went to a Going Away Party, a Jersey Shore Party and a “I have Tequila!” Party. I think I’m a little partied out….

Adios Amigo! — Thursday

One of my co-workers just found a “better job” closer to his home. Here at Anonymous Software Company, he rolled in at 9am, left at 4pm and often refused to do certain projects (I wish I had that job!). Somehow he was passed over during the layoff period. We used to say that he was related to cockroaches – able to survive even the greatest apocalypse. He would frequently say the most perverted things – think Michael Scott from “The Office”. If we had ever had a sexual harassment seminar, he would have brought a blowup doll.

It’s sad that he’ll be gone, because he always made our office interesting. Saying disgusting things and playing the worst pranks. He liked to superglue coffee cups to desks and if he found an unlocked computer he would change the desktop to something inappropriate (a monkey touching himself, for example). I think I found it funny because he never pranked me…

So goodbye K, you were great!

Snooki’s Birthday Bash — Friday

NOTE: Clearly I don’t mean the real Snooki.

I have never seen Jersey Shore, but if it was anything like this party then watching it would cause my brain to explode. Even though I was told a costume was required, I didn’t dress up. I had a really good excuse — I’d been taking care of my disable grandfather right before the party and just barely managed to even attend, let alone find a spandex dress 3 sizes too small.

Everyone had been assigned a character – I was supposed to be Angela or something like that. Basically the bitch they all hate because no one else wanted to be her. But they were CRAZY. Apparently everyone else at the party is a huge fan of the show, so they started yelling at each other about slights committed on the show, I guess to stay in character.

I did some shots and let the buzz take over rather than deal with it. It was pretty fun, until “Angelo”* got way too drunk. Angelo is a flaming gay man. The first time we met was at a New Year’s party and he was wearing an outfit Lady Gaga would have swooned over and fake metallic gold eyelashes. However, at this party he decided to test his boundaries, to try new things, to see what having sex with a woman was like.


Sex with a woman.

You may think he’s bisexual (I don’t think so, but you never know), or that he’s secretly straight (why would it be a secret?) but the man was determined to try it out. I don’t think he managed to have straight sex, but it did make the party even weirder.

*Names changed to protect the embarrassed

A Man and His BBQ  — Saturday

One of my coworkers was laid off at the height of the recession. I recently saw him at K’s going away party and he mentioned that he was having a BBQ to celebrate the fact that his wife bought him a new grill. I went over and started doing shots (Rum is only 1 letter away from Yum!) and seeing old coworkers who had left or been let go.

I don’t normally comment on how other people raise their children, but it was unnerving for me to find out that they allow their two children to drink beer. They claim that they “only let them take a few sips” but when everyone starting getting drunk I saw his oldest take MUCH more than a few sips. I know in many other countries children are allowed to drink wine at dinner with family, but this was drinking beer at a party where everyone except the one nursing mother was smashed.

And that was my weekend. I spent most of Sunday recovering and playing with my cat.